What do the clubs say they stand for?
Gold Coast Suns
North Melbourne Kangaroos
Port Adelaide Power
St Kilda Saints
West Coast Eagles
Canterbury was established in 1935 when Sydney was in the grip of the great depression. Initially, its nickname was the "Country Bumpkins" because of their rural recruiting and the CB emblem. Later they became known as the "The Berries" until common sense prevailed and in 1978 they adopted the far more intimidating "Bulldogs." Canterbury has strong support from Western Sydney's Islamic community and by Rugby League standards, it is a cosmopolitan club.
On the downside, in the 90s and early naughties, the Bulldogs showed that being multicultural also meant demonstrating certain cultural values that others found highly offensive. One such culture was the fans' habit of celebrating victory by damaging phone booths and vandalising trains. Perhaps attacking inanimate objects was their way of proving they were bad-arsed rebels, and in their own minds, as courageus as a rugby league prop charging head on into battle.
Just as fans weren't too fond of rules, neither was the club's administration. Firstly, in 1997 they defected to Rupert Murdoch's Super League. Secondly, in 2002, the NRL stripped them of all their premiership points after they were found to be cheating the salary cap. Thirdly, the club also formed an alliance with Liverpool City Council to build a super entertainment complex. The plan fell through amid allegations of underhand deals and missing funds.
As for the players, they were renowned for their love of a gang bang and on multiple occasions, women alleged that they had been pack-raped by Bulldog players. Other players were alleged to have identified a little too closely with the Bulldog moniker and so marked their territory by urinating on women in nightclubs. Most recently, Mad Monday celebrations saw players photographed walking around the street naked.
Despite all the scandals, the club has continued to thrive and prosper. Even when it has been at its lowest ebb, it had an ability to pull a rabbit out of the hat. This was first seen at the height of the Super League war when its crowds became non-existent and extinction seemed inevitable. The players then developed what became known as the "bulldog roll." When the game seemed lost, the players were able to find an unstoppable momentum that would carry them to victory. As well as bringing glory on the field, it also won them back most of their lost fans.
After the gang-rape allegations of 2004, marketing pundits were predicting that if the club survived, it would have to adopt a new logo that wasn't tainted by the scandals. The players responded by winning the premiership, and thus kept the club's name intact. Off the field, membership sales actually increased through the whole saga.
Perhaps the club even won over a few of the local police officers. So often did they have to attend troublemakers at games, maybe the police became grateful that the club was keeping them employed. Conveniently for them, their blue and white uniforms even allowed them to demonstrate whose side they were on.
2004 - When compared to other NRL supporters
2006 - When compared to other NRL supporters
Steve Mortimer - Half-back who helped the Bulldogs deny Parramatta a few Grand Final victories.
Terry Lamb - Short-stocky playmaker who denied Manly a Grand Final victory. Had an impressive mullet.
Big Willie Manson - Cult player who spawned a cult following with a huge afro. Was in danger of being kicked out of the game following rape allegations yet survived and popularity continued to grow.
Hazem El Masri - Devout muslim and not involved in any of the club's troublemaking activities. Set a fine example for fans and other players to follow. Arguably, the best goal kicker of all time.
When the Bulldogs play the Roosters, it seems the two clubs have decided to follow soccer's example by fighting in the stands rather than on the footy field.
After the 2004 Grand Final Victory, Bulldog fans flocked to Bondi beach and waved their flags and beeped their horns for three days. Obviously the Bulldogs aren't the smartest lot otherwise they would have realised that no one in Bondi cared. Afterall, the Roosters don't have fans.
In the 80s the Bulldogs had a great rivalry going with Parramatta. But the Eels have been hopeless for years and beating a garbage team gives no one any pleasure.
Q: What do you say to a Bulldogs fan that has a job?
A:"Can I have a Big Mac and medium fries, please?"
Q:Why do Bulldog's administrator's never drink out of the bottle?
A:Because they can never manage to get the cap back on.
Three Bulldog's accountants were in a bar together. One could read, one could write and the third one just liked hanging around intellectuals.
4) Steve Folks hears of new young recruit who lives in Bosnia. Folks catches a plane to war torn Bosnia and tracks the young boy down. He risks life and limb dodging bombs, bullets and grenades but finally find him and convince him to come to Australia.
The boy does a full pre-season, plays all the practice matches and gets picked on the bench in the seniors for the first game of the year. Ten minutes into the first quarter, Big Willie down with a severe knee injury. Folk turns to the boy and says "This is it son, go to prop and show us what you can do."
The boy proceeds to play the greatest debut game in NRL history. He scores three tries, makes five try saving tackles, and makes 40 hit ups.
Folks tells the team what the boy from Bosnia has been through and that he is a model lesson for all. Folks then pulls the boy aside and says "Go into my office son, ring your Mother and tell her what you did today". He proceeds to do so.
"Mum", he says down the phone, "Guess what I did today? "I don't care what you did today his Mother replies. "I tell you what happened here today", she goes on. "Your Dad was murdered, our house torched, our car blown up, your sister raped and your brother abducted." "Gee," says the boy. "I feel a bit responsible for what happened". The Mother replies "So you should be. If it wasn't for you we wouldn't have shifted to Canterbury."
5) Three friends all die at the same time and end up at the pearly gates where Albert Einstein is waiting for them. The first chap approached and Alby asks him,
"What is your IQ, my good man?"
"250" the chap replies.
"Ah excellent. We can participate in meaningful and articulate discussions with my mates Plato and Newton about the Theory of Relativity, Chaos Theory, Astrophysics and the Theory of Everything. We will have much to discuss. You may enter."
The second fellow approached the gate and Albert asks him the same question.
"150" was the reply.
"Ah good. We can discuss the fascinating subjects of History, Philosophy, Economics and Sociology. We will have much to discuss. You may enter."
The third chap approaches the gate nervously.
"Now my good man, what is your IQ?"
"50" the third man replies sheepishly. To which Alby's response was ....
"How about those Bulldgs, hey?"